100 Days of My Youth (Day 66): Empty

Today, like all other days, I came back to my house, calm as I had left it. Dropped my laptop at the couch, smoothly put off my shoes as I had a heavy sigh of relief after a long and busy day at work. Everything was intact like I had hoped it would be but one thing stood out though, I was alone!

In the dark before I reached for the switch to light up the sitting room, welcomed by the annoying continued buzz of the Yaka Meter, I was alone like I’ve always been.

I know it’s not me alone who feels this way. Folks like me have deliberately forced themselves to the introverted circles, they have been on the run countless times from what is the reality, We’ve been hidden behind our phones pretending to be just fine, faked the happiness there is and we’ve pretended to find closure in being all alone and by ourselves.

For those that can’t stand it any longer have called up their friends for plot, some have fallen in love and have moved in together to start life. Majority of us are still there, undecided on what we want.

Clearly, often times and if not so, most times, it has left us empty and lonely. We’ve locked ourselves in our apartments and have buried ourselves in our phones, PS4 games & laptops building a virtual world around us. We admit that we keep in touch with those we care for but maybe that’s not enough.

See we no longer love to talk for hours like we used to, laugh over the same jokes and create plans the argue to hang up on eachother. No, that’s no longer cool, we say! We love to text, share gifs, memes, short videos and chat away. We don’t even fancy meeting anymore as we feel it’s enough just texting and having lengthy chats.

Today, I walked Into my apartment and felt alone,I had no one that I could tell how my day was. As I walked through the corridors, I didn’t have atleast someone to meet me halfway with a warm hug to welcome me back. Maybe a companion or even just a buddy to see “Wassup Man”. Nothing!

It hit me just how I’ve drifted away from the small things that really matter just because of either my work or my insane love for technology that’s has slowly engulfed me in some sort of den.

My heroine is now becoming a hazard to me. It’s no longer helping like I hoped it would. On a daily, I’ve always turned to my phone to give me all the solace I’ve ever needed and I will ever need in this world. Even when I’m alone, I’d hoped that I would count on my internet connection to fill me up.

Today, that’s not the case! It’s not the usual peace of mind that comes by. Everything seems to be stagnated and I’m just rotating around the same routine and it’s fast becoming boring.

The urge to get a companion gets stronger by the day but every when my mind settles down and remembers the challenges with which that step comes with, I shy away and prolong my desires to the next summer. Sometimes, I feel empty, I feel alone!